NO LADIES NO!

Women are nurturers and care givers right? If you need a hug, a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, or kind words 9 times out of 10 you reach out to a woman... And we do it so well! We dole out sound advice, we pray and even fast on behalf of others we spend our last dime looking out for others, our kindness to others knows no bounds so that means we know how to take care of situations right? Right... So if we can go to all these lengths for others why can't we look out for ourselves? By ourselves I mean you yourself WENA YOU reading this right now *if you're a woman, I assume*.

This rant is inspired by a frantic message I just received from a friend of a friend who has been involved with her man for 7 years and they have been engaged and living together for the past 6. When I say engaged I mean lobola has been paid all that remains is for them to take an itty bitty stroll down the aisle and for him to put a ring on it. This friend of a friend has begged, cried and pleaded with her guy but the mere mention of marriage makes him very aggressive. She has since managed her expectations and only asks for them to go and make it official at Home Affairs. He agreed 3 months ago and said they would go on a particular date. When said date arrived he found a way to worm out of honoring the promise he made... Now she's confused.

We all know what must happen right? Why is she confused? We all know why he is stalling, she does too but she chooses to believe she is confused. COME ON! How many songs must Beyonce sing about it before we get it? If a man wants you he will do all he can to get and keep you, he will literally move heaven and earth, when a man truly wants you he will beg, buy, steal or borrow anything to be with you! If he doesn't want you well, he will not bother. I think that is what Steve Harvey was trying to tell us, but because we are so good at loving and caring and nurturing others we never know when to stop and give ourselves that love and compassion. Rejection hurts I know, but just because Sipho doesn't want you is not the end of the world! You may find Vusi or Themba are better catches than Sipho anyway. Please girls before you give another iota of your love and kindness won't you please give some to yourself you deserve love, you deserve happiness, you deserve monogamy just refuse to settle PLEASE!